Sadly, Paul’s dad passed away only a few days into the New Year. It was good that Paul was there at the time, and therefore managed to spend his dad’s last few days with him. I’m pleased he didn’t have to die alone. No-one should have to die alone.
His funeral was today, and currently Paul, along with dad’s other close friends and family will be at the wake celebrating dad’s life. There will be tears I’m sure, but also a lot of laughter as humorous stories are shared of dad’s sometimes infamous pranks and anecdotes. He was a very funny man. He was a really good man. And he was a truly contented man. I loved him very, very much.
I wish I was there as dad’s last hurrah takes place. Whilst his chapter is now over, his memory will live on in our book of life until our turn comes.
Dad, you were a truly good father, father-in-law, and grandfather to Paul, myself, Alice and Kelvin. You may be gone from this earth now, but your memories will continue to enhance our lives. We’ll continue to play crib in your honour, and we’ll continue to recall and re-tell your humorous stories. We loved you dearly dad. We’ll miss you. You were a ‘good man’. And I mean it more than words can express when I say it was a real pleasure to have known you. Rest peacefully dad.
I currently have grandson number 2 staying with me, along with three other members of his six member band, Raksha. So, that’s four staying, and the other two are currently visiting for the day, along with the boyfriend of the lead singer.
The band breaking for lunch.
How did this come about, I hear you ask? And I’m asking myself the same question.
It went like this:
When Josh came down over Christmas I said,
“The garage would make a pretty good place for the band to stay should you ever get a gig in Busselton, all you’d need is some air mattresses or camp beds”.
The idea of band rehearsals was briefly raised. I said,
“No, we live in an oldies area, it’s a place to stay, but not practice, at least not with any noise”.
However, I think what Josh heard was,
“Look at our garage, wouldn’t it make a cool place for band rehearsals, as long as you only practice at half volume.”
At the time of the discussion Josh was staying here along with Number 1 grandson, and Alice and Paul. The caravan was offered as a place for someone to sleep at that time, but at that time was declined. Now, not much more than two weeks later The Battle of the Bands is on in Busselton, and you guessed it – Raksha entered the completion.
Josh, doing battle.
Along with having worked out the garage was a perfect place for rehearsals, Josh had also worked out the logistics of the sleeping arrangements for the entire band for three nights. And so, I have four of them staying here, utilising the caravan and the two spare bedrooms. Today the other two band members are visiting, along with the boyfriend of the lead singer. And, there is talk of these other three also dossing down – still to be decided!
So, here’s how it’s gone so far.
What I wanted to say was this,
“Okay, guys some basic rules:
Beds get made,
Towels get hung out to dry,
You all help with dishes,
The toilet brush is to be used should you cause a need.”
However, thinking that might clearly sound like someone speaking in tongues, I decided to only go with two, the dishes and the towels.
Dinner dishes were done last night.
Late night dishes were left for the morning (an act of consideration apparently as they may have made too much noise) – that’s cool.
Breakfast dishes were good.
Lunch dishes with three additional dinners – not a chance…… I could see it clearly didn’t cross any ones mind.
And two towels have been hung to dry. Goodness knows where the other two are.
I’ve closed the bedroom doors, best not to look! I’ve no idea where the other two towels are, but should they be screwed up wet on a bedroom floor I’m sure the lesson will be learned when they find out this little household of only two people doesn’t have any more spare towels.
So, apart from being shell shocked as my peace and tranquility has been shattered, how else is it going? When there’s only four of them, it really is good, no problems worthy of mention really, and in fact, good company. Manners and thoughtfulness, are in evidence most of the time, and they are respectful. However, when the numbers swelled to seven I was feeling a bit like the intruder. The thoughtfulness previously in evidence diminished considerably. I guess seven people channelling all their energy into their creative talents overshadows all other thought.
They have now gone out for a few hours, so I’m enjoying the quiet, no radio, no TV and definitely no band practice in the garage. Absolute bliss. Before they left, I gave them a gentle reminder about ‘the dishes’. A couple of slightly embarrassed faces when they realised that yes, they had jumped up from the lunch table and rushed back to band practice without a thought to their plates. I think they took it on board.
Oh – and the Battle of the Bands, they had the heats last night. I tried to take some photos during the night but most turned out to blurry. My new friends and neighbours, Kay and Brian came with me. It was freezing and we only stayed long enough to give our support to Raksha. It was great to have had some company, I really appreciated it.
Kay and Brian supporting me and the band – check out the pod Kay is cocooned in against the cold – cool eh!
We came home before the finalists had been decided. It was good news when the boys came home. They’re in tomorrow nights finals along with three other acts. They seem to think the others are pretty good, so although they’re hoping to win, they know they’ve got to work hard it, and even then perhaps they may need a bit luck on their side as well. And then if they do win, they have to hope they don’t get disqualified. The competition is open only open to residents of the South West, so they’re illegal entrants. They’re looking on the bright side, should they win, and their Perth residency status be discovered, they could get disqualified. They’ve decided should that happen, disqualification will only serve to get them noticed even more. Gotta luv ’em.
Watch this space for tomorrow nights results. Hopefully I’ll manage to get some clearer pictures of the band on stage, which I’m sure you’ll all be eager to see.
2016 is done and dusted, and 2017 begins. Paul is beginning his new year in the cold of the UK again. He left on the 28th December with the intentions of being over there for 3 weeks. The intended purpose was to finalise his dads flat and all the associated direct debits.
However, only a few days after arriving his dad was taken to hospital with pneumonia. Options have been exhausted and there’s nothing more can be done except for dad to be kept comfortable. He’s been transferred to a hospice for palliative, end of life care, so now it’s just a matter of time.
The waiting is difficult. I gather that although dad is on morphine he’s not resting comfortably. Paul is tired, and struggling, and I’m feeling useless and impotent being so far away. His cousin Stephen is being very supportive, and his other cousin Margaret is due to arrive in Manchester from Portsmouth later this afternoon.
Paul and I had talked about the possibility that this may occur, and had decided it wouldn’t be sensible for me to jump on the next plane and head over there too. So, whilst it’s my instinct to do just that, I’m sticking with the intended plain. Paul’s intended three weeks is most likely going to be extended, but until his dad actually goes we don’t know how much longer will be needed. A difficult time…..
I’m here on my lonesome keeping the newly planted garden watered in the heat of summer. With reticulation restrictions in place it felt like a full time job when we went through a particularly hot spell a few days ago. Thankfully, it’s cooled down again now though, so not quite so full on.
Apart from the all consuming wait, what else has been happening in this neck of the woods. My little job that I started just before Christmas at Bunbury Farmers market was a job that felt like it had been tailor made for me, with the exception of the distance. It’s nearly an hours drive in each direction. At the end of a shift I was finding myself tired, and the drive home into the setting sun didn’t feel that safe. With the addition of losing sleep with worry about dad and Paul, it’s brought forward what was probably inevitable in light of the distance. I’ve decided it’s not practical or safe to continue, so my status of ‘semi-retired’ has reverted back to ‘retired’.
Probably just as well. Number two grandson is coming down to Busselton with all the members of his band, Raksha, next week-end for the Battle of the Bands. They are intending to be down here for three nights and want to use our place for rehearsing. I’m not sure how many are staying here. I gather some have family down here on holidays for at least part of the time, so it may not be all six every night. Josh has indicated it most likely will be all of them for some of the nights. I think it’s just as well that I’m going to be here full time to ensure the neighbours remain on speaking terms at the end of the three nights – I’ve heard the band practicing before! What Josh thinks is an acceptable volume for neighbours is somewhat different to what we think. So, next week-end I’ll be kept on my toes…
Watch this space – photos of Josh and his band coming soon…..
We came back today from a two day break up in Perth for grandson number 1’s 21st birthday celebrations.
We had a number of things to do for ourselves in Perth, so the first day was mainly spent shopping for odds and ends for our new house. Amongst other purchases, Paul managed to find himself a good second hand bike. He’ll enjoy zipping up and down the Geographe Bay cycle track overlooking the bay.
Saturday, the day of the big party we put in a few hours around at Alice’s helping her with the preparations. Not that she really needed much help, she seemed to have everything mostly under control.
Then, back to our caravan to get ourselves ready and back to the party.
Tim, ready to greet his guests.
What a joy Tim is to be around. Accolades to both of his parents – he’s turning out to be a delightful young man. It’s an absolute pleasure to be in his company.
Alice slaving over a hot stove.
Alice must have spent days shopping and cooking for tonights event. Spring rolls, samosas, and home made sausage rolls went down a treat early in the evening. Then, disposable cups filled with either a vegan curry or a delicious tortellini carbonara with broccoli to ensure the booze wasn’t going into empty stomachs.
Pop with grandson 2 towering over him.
I rarely have a camera at hand when around the boys. I made the most of it while I could.
Having a drink with the ‘man of the moment’.Raksha, Josh’s band provided entertainment for part of the night.
Raksha, Josh’s band have recently released an EP called Emerald. They’re getting a few gigs now, and are due to sign up for a three month trial with a manager. No pay for tonight’s gig though, all done in the name of brotherly love.
Proud mum and son.Paul and Alice
I hadn’t expected to be back in the region of Perth until next year. I’m so pleased our change of plans brought us back here earlier. Such a proud night to be with our two gorgeous grandsons.
We had been debating whether or not we should downsize our big rig for something smaller now that we’re only going to be living in it for part of the year. This short trip with an almost empty van convinced us not to even think about such a thing. Travelling and staying in an uncluttered van with room to move – absolute joy, a real pleasure!
We spent our last afternoon with Kelv three days ago. While a roast was cooking, he proudly showed us around the farm – It’s absolutely huge.
Kelv couldn’t be prouder of his mangos if he owned the farm himself.Avenues of trees stretching for miles in every direction.
The farm now has the contract to provide Coles, one of our biggest supermarket chains with mangoes this year.
Just some of the boxes in packing shed waiting to be filled.
I can’t believe how much his own home patch has grown. I’m sure the palms are a good 15cms higher, and there’s green lawn now showing where last week it was just red dirt.
Remember this sand patch less than a week ago!
It was sad to say good bye, but time moves on, and so must we. Friday saw us heading down the Victoria Highway, which forms a section of the Savannah Way, one of Australia’s great drives.
The Victoria River splits the Gregory National Park, home to some of the majestic scenery in Australia. Hundreds of miles of panoramic scenery, so stunning I’m sure my heart missed a beat a couple of times. It was like watching an enormous nature movie, the windshield our giant screen….. Breathtaking.
Majestic.Breathtaking!More at every turn in the road.
I believe theres even more stunning scenery to be seen on side trips from the Victoria Roadhouse, which is smack bang in the middle of it all. We didn’t stop this time, but mental note to myself, ‘stay a night or two to explore next time’. A definite must.
After around five hours driving we arrived in Western Australia, then only a short distance further and we were at Lake Argyle. More on that tomorrow.
After almost two and a half years we’re back in WA.
We’re having lots of catch up time with Kelv here in Katherine. His transportable house was finished within a day or two of us arriving. Not good timing for him as the mango harvest isn’t far off beginning, so his work days are becoming longer.
He managed to get a 1/2 day off work last Friday. His new motor bike was ready in Darwin (a replica of Steve McQueen’s bike in The Great Escape), and his house needed curtains and blinds before he could move in.
So, we had a trip into Darwin with him, firstly to pick out blinds and curtains, and then we dropped him off to pick up his bike and choose his helmet. We headed back to Katherine with all the shopping, leaving him to test drive his new bike to a friends house Darwin. It was already almost almost 5pm by this stage so to dangerous for a 300 km motor-bike trip home on the dark country roads – too many wallabies, kangaroos and cows on the roads in the dark for safe motor-cycling. So, he stayed in Darwin seemingly doing justice to celebrating both his new house, and new motor bike.
He’s bought some basic furniture to get himself started and has now moved in.
This week he’s pulled out all stops to get the front lawn started before his work season starts to demand his full and undivided attention. The front sand patch needed levelling before he could plant lawn seed. After several days of raking and watering it was in reasonable shape – no mean feat after a days work in 37 degrees with increasing humidity. The lawn seed’s now in, along with a small, fast growing tree.
Lawn seed and one small tree has been planted.
The back lawn was nothing but a sand patch with a few trees a week ago. With no shortage of water, the sprinkler’s been running constantly. I can’t believe the difference a week of sun, fertiliser and water has made. It’s almost half way to being green now.
What a difference a week of water, sun and fertiliser makes to a sand patch.
We’ve been doing our bit to help, including planting a small group of golden cane palms, and some small hibiscus to form a hedge.
The mango orchard forms a pleasing back ground from Kelv’s back verandah.The beginnings of an Hibiscus hedge.
It’ll be great to come back next winter and see how they’ve all grown.
And after all the gardening, a bike ramp was needed. With the carport yet to be added to the house, and with no garage, the next best place for a motor-bike to be housed is seemingly on the back verandah. As a woman, I couldn’t really relate to this logic, but it made full sense to all the men. So a bike ramp was built, a full days job with both Paul and Kelv working on it.
Kelv adding the final cross plank while his two ‘supervisors’ look on.
Then time to test it out.
Going up!And the big test – coming down!
Coming down was a little hairy! It only just has enough clearance, and could perhaps have been a little less steep. But he managed it, and I’m sure it’ll get easier with practice.
And now, onto some news of our own. It’s been an eventful week. Firstly, Paul’s dads ended up back in hospital following a fall. He’s been discharged now, but is again in Butler Green, an intermediate care facility. I think he’ll be home again soon, but it’s looking more like permanent care could be on the agenda soon.
Next news, Dad’s house went to auction last Tuesday, and sold for considerably more than the reserve price. What a relief to have that sold. It was a worry.
And finally, some news all of our own, drum roll please……. We’ve bought another house! In Busselton, beachside and very close to where we had our block of land in Abbey.
Kelv and some friends from Perth were with us for dinner a few nights ago, when Kelv asked us if we were going to be renting this one out too. He went into hysterics when we explained we’re not, and the reasons why.
Our reasoning is as follows: We love Tassie, we love the Northern Territory, and we love Western Australia. We’re sure there’s no better place in the world to spend summers than in Busselton, with Tassie a close second (but Tassie does lack Busselton’s more consistent summer climate). And for the winters – for us the Kimberleys and NT beat anywhere else by an Aussie country mile. The consistent weather, the wide open spaces, with room to move and air to breath.And with the biggest surprise for us in this whole road trip being that what we’ve so far seen of the east coast, it doesn’t get a look in, in comparison to the west.
With our love of the East Kimberleys, and the NT, and with Kelv living in the NT, this is where we want to head to for winters. With the boat access from Tassie being so expensive and so restrictive, it isn’t such an appealing place to use as a permanent summer base.
So, there’s been a downturn in the Busselton market, which seemed like to good an opportunity to pass by. And it was such a good buy that we don’t have to rent it out.
However, we do still have our house in lovely Deloraine, and we do still intend to spend some time there – one day……
And why was Kelv, and Bruce and Wendy in hysterics. Because we’re going to use the Busselton house as our ‘summer house’, for approximately six months of the year, and the rest of the time we’ll keep travelling around this wonderful, vast land. They thought, ‘our summer house’, sounded so toffee nosed. So, for evermore now, it’ll be ‘our summerhouse’.
Another frustrating weekend as we try to deal with the UK Social Services debacle. We don’t mention it much anymore because nothing changes and we just end up sounding like a broken record.
Now though with the technology limitations here at the station, individual emails aren’t feasible, so the best way of letting everyone know what’s happening with Glyn is via the blog.
Dad was transferred from hospital to Shawside a little over two weeks ago. Social Services bi-passed Paul who has Power of Attorney and went straight to Glyn for approval to admit him to what we gather is one of the most expensive care facilities in Oldham. They had Glyn sign a two week contract whilst he was in hospital being treated for pneumonia, a UTI, and resolving delirium with hallucinations. The two week contract expired on Friday and he should have been sent home.
We went into Karumba to stay overnight on Saturday so as to phone him at home. After several unanswered phone calls we called Shawside – he was still there. Paul spoke with him. He sounded ok, but had no idea why he hadn’t been sent home. No-one seems to be informing either him, or us of anything that’s happening.
We phoned back and spoke to the ward matron enquiring as to why he was still there. Apparently after Social Services obtained his consent they dumped him at Shawside and have made no contact since. This isn’t supposed to happen. Shawside, having assessed him found him fit to return home, but with some daily support. They kept trying to make contact with Social Services to arrange a home care package, but Social Services wouldn’t respond. Showing a proper duty of care Shawside felt they had no option but to keep Glyn in rather than sending him home unsupported. Apparently this isn’t an unusual occurance lately and Shawside sound like they they are about as frustrated with Social Services as we are.
So, another sleepless night worrying about what can be done followed by another morning sending emails to the relevant people to try and make sense of it all. This time I’ve located the complaints department for Social Services and have lodged a complaint. I’ve located the Ombudsman for follow up, should that fall on deaf ears, and if all that fails, I’ve found a UK lawyer that specialises in lawsuits against Social Sevices for negligence. An awful path to have to go down, but I think we’re running out of options. Poor Glyn. I just wish there was something we could do to make his life more comfortable. It shouldn’t be this hard.
We’ve been so preoccupied with affairs in England that we’ve barely been aware of dilemmas being faced by friends and family here in Tasmania. It came as a shock this morning to wake to the news of Tassies floods, and apparently all of yesterday they were experiencing a deluge. My sister lives in one of two suburbs smack bang in the middle of Launcestons major risk flood plains. Fifty houses have been evacuated from one of those suburbs. I haven’t yet contacted Wendy to hear if all is okay with her and her fur babies.
I wonder if our own house has suffered any major damage. I know the Meander River near by is flooding, but our house is on high ground so should be safe from river flooding. There is an underground creek that runs under the property though so I guess it’s possible that could rise and become a problem. No doubt we’ll hear if there’s any problems there.
So, the silver linings:
– We came back from the UK when we did. Our caravan would likely have not fared so well in open storage with such a deluge.
– We managed to get on the ferry and across to the mainland. With many caravanners stuck there until July I dread to think how they’ve managed. We’ve heard the Deloraine caravan park was evacuated a couple of days ago.
– We’re above the bad weather and are high and dry at Airlie Beach.
Sometimes you just have to look for things to be grateful for….
As far as England goes, still no change with Pauls dad. He’s still in hospital and no cause for his current fragile state has been found. It’s looking more and more likely that he’ll be moved to a temporary care facility until he either gets enough strength back to return home, or deteriorates further. I suspect full time care is not far away, but from medical reports he should be able to be coping. Either they’re missing something, or dads just unable to motivate himself. I know he’s very lonely.
We haven’t yet told him the sale of his house has fallen through, or the reason for it. We’re trying to get a plan of action in place first. We’re hoping if the bad news is delivered along with a clear idea of what happens next that the news won’t be to upsetting for him.
I must say its the absolute pits to be in this situation, both for Pauls dad, and for Paul. We can’t go back over there to help again. We’re at an age now where it’s to risky to spend lengthy times in other countries where access to normal health services, available to us here, aren’t available to us there. Plus the logistics, and the financial implications mean further trips to the UK are out of the question. We can’t be on hand to offer up close support any more. Like I said, it’s the pits, and I wouldn’t wish this situation on my worst enemy. But as Kelv kindly reminded me yesterday, ” this too will pass”. All things pass, good times roll into bad, and bad times into good. Hopefully, our good times will come again soon. Not that things aren’t good now, or at least they would be if it wasn’t for the worries in the UK.
In my last post I mentioned that Pauls dad isn’t doing well, yet tests indicate he hasn’t any medical problems causing his current state.
We received several emails and communications from the crisis team after Glyn rang his emergency buzzer last week and was taken into accident and emergency. He was thoroughly checked – nothing found, and sent home. His Dr made a house call and spent approximately 1 1/2 hours with him – again, all found to be good. My last post was based on these assurances received from the social worker now in charge of Glyn. There was no misunderstand, we have these details in writing.
Four visits a day had been arranged from carers to attend to meals and his personal needs. During one of Pauls phone calls to his dad, his dad became very distressed and pleaded for us to return, saying he feels sick and no ones doing anything. Later that same day, last Thursday he apparently rang the emergency buzzer again. We received a call in the middle of our night, again indicating nothing serious is going on.
Then they tested his blood sugars – dangerously high, and I presume he’s entered into a state of ketoacidosis. It’s very hard for us to get any details from the hospital with privacy laws and phoning from a different country. He’s already suffering stage three kidney failure so goodness knows what further damage this extended time with this serious condition has caused.
We know at this stage he is to be kept in hospital until at least Tuesday. We can’t get any answers as to whether or not they are managing to bring his sugars under control. Nor can we find out if they’ve subsequently had him seen by a renal specialist to check for further kidney deteriorioration. Nor can we get any answers as to whether this has caused additional deterioration to his already compromised leg issues. Why can’t we get any answers, because they keep the identity of people we could be asking a closely guarded secret. Not only that, any information seems to be on a need to know basis, and clearly the next of kin and Glyns only child is way done on that list. That’s if they have a list at all. I suspect things left in the ether have no ability to come back and bite them, and with their constant medical negligence, if any coherant records are kept there would be the potential for them not only to be bitten, but eaten alive.
Why do I say with such certainty they are medically negligent. They sent Pauls dad home in a clearly agitated state seemingly with a medical diagnosis that nothing is wrong. The GP came to same conclusion, yet all the time his blood sugars were soring. Why on earth did they not test his sugar levels. Surely for a diabetic such a test should be as routine as testing his blood pressure when he’s complaining of feeling unwell and presenting in a confused and agitated state.
More useless than an udder on a bull would be an under statement. If it wasn’t for the further turmoil it would create in our lives we would at this stage be instigating legal proceedings. If similar things continue to happen, I think we’re going to feel an obligation to make someone answerable. Polite, and sometimes not so polite conversations get nowhere. I’m thinking that only a law suit could end up with anyone realising Glyn’s medical needs are being severely compromised by extreme negligence.
Life of Riley - on whatever 